Happiness... as defined by ME

Happiness is the loving the unknown of each day, the uncertainty of each promise and accepting each as they for what they are.

Happiness is hearing Grace and Madison laugh. Seeing Todd smile. Watching my sisters grow-up to be the people they want to be. Watching my parents become their own people again aside from raising kids. Meeting up with friends to talk about life. Every doctor's appointment filled with good news about the new baby. Waking up each morning.

Happiness is family and smiles and pain and love and heartbreak. Happiness is knowing that no matter how bad my day is... I still have so much to be thankful for.

Happiness lies in the ability to look for at least one thing to be happy for and when you have a hard time finding that one thing you can always remind yourself that you're still here and breathing and that alone is enough to be happy about!

My secrets...

Inspired by the book I'm currently reading (I'd tell you the title but my daughter stole the book and ran away with it!)

1. I don't like reading serious books. I prefer light-hearted, relatable books.
2. My pinky toe and fingers are slightly crocked.
3. I don't think all babies are cute.
4. I've always wanted to be a teacher and a cosmotologist!
5. I hate panty hose.
6. I don't think people with fat ankles should wear flat shoes and for this reason everyone should own a full length mirror.
7. I'd fill my flower beds with fake flowers if I didnt think people would notice. (bright pink gerber daisies in the middle of winter might draw a little attention).
8. I love to write.
9. I was 22 years old the first time I got drunk.
10. My first and purest love was Travis Clements.
11. My most memorable kiss was Brennan Gravois.
12. I still miss living with Dwayne and Lance from time to time. They were the best roommates.
13. I've always wanted to write a children's book.
14. Todd's nose is my favorite part.
15. I steal my favorite pens from the office.
16. The rice dressing most people think I make from scratch starts from a box!
17. I once dried Todd's blue jeans (they shrink in length when dried) on purpose because he dried one of my favorite shirts and I couldn't wear it anymore.
18. I love Candy Apples from the fair!
19. I'm a closet smoker.
20. I still think my husband is sexy but I don't tell him as often as I think it because I'm all big, round and pregnant! (selffish, I know!)


To be continued...

Oh and the name of the book is Can you keep a secret?

Oh silent night!

So... last night Grace slept at her Nana's and Todd was fishing. It was the first time I've had the house to myself for the entire night in probably three years! It was boring at first but then I wisened up and took advantage of it! I watched Seven Pounds which I though was great and then I read a few chapters of my new book. I fell asleep around 11:00 and slept until 8:30 this morning. Can I just say WONDERFUL! I haven't slept that well in a year. I feel like a new women today.

Still ready as ever for Baby Cameron to make his way into this world although I'm not quite as anxious as I had been. Seeing him in the ultrasound and knowing that he's growing and developing well put my mind at ease. Funny how we worry more for baby no. 2!

Looking forward to the long weekend... Hope everyone else has a good one too!

Today's Ultrasound

Today I had an ultrasound at the training center. It was really great to see how much he's grown in 10 weeks. While they assured me that the measurements may be off, according what we got today, Baby Cameron weighs 4.6 lbs which means... he's going to be a very healthy baby! Either that or I am little further along than we expected!
The pictures were so clear. No mistake, it's a boy and he's rather active. He kicked and moved everytime the Tech pressed on my belly. He espeically likes to dig his heel (or some part of his body) into my left side. He catches me by suprise sometimes as if to say 'Look out mom, I'm getting ready!"

SO MUCH TO LOVE ABOUT MY LIFE!

Lucky me and my great husband!

Original post date: 5/19/2009

Pregnant, emotional, overly dramatic... to describe myself on a good day. I've invested a great deal of time in trying to be good at the things I do. I am and I love being a mother, a sister, a daughter, and a friend. I also love being a wife although sometimes I take being married for granted, almost as if it's just another role in life wherein it comes with the kids and the in-laws, etc. But... it is so much more than that. I've realized that I have more than a lot to be thankful for when it comes to my marriage... I have everything to be thankful for. I really do have a great husband. Sure, we've had our ups and downs, even a few tornado's but at the end of the day he is the man I want to spend all of the other days with... he is my "forever." We argue, fuss, pick-on each other and most days we drive each other nuts but he does love me. And lord knows he has to put up with and deal with way more as my husband than I do as his wife! It's harder to tolerate me than I'd like to admit but he does and oddly enough - he very rarely complains, especially in relation to how much complaining I do! I know that in a week from now I'll be mad at him but that's all a part of marriage. I don't believe in one true love. I beleive that one day we fall for someone and it's up to us to decide whether or not that person is the person we want to do forever with. Wwen we say I do... it's not just to the honeymoon and the good days, its to all of the above and all of the below! Its to getting fat, raising kids differently, hating some of each others friends, bad breath, terrible hair cuts... and it's also I do to loving you even when I'm not in love with you and it's vowing to always do whatever is possible to fall back in love. When I'm not strong, Todd is strong for both of us. When I'm stubborn, he becomes the bigger person and helps me along the way. I hate that he thinks I'm messy because I'm not but then again... maybe my version of messy and his are just too different things. So... in the end, I love my husband and I am so, so lucky to have him.

I love...

Original Post date: 5/12/2009

Picking my next good read based on the cover alone. The smell of cupcakes baking. When Todd cooks dinner. Watching Grace snap 50 times a day because she just learned how. Feeling the baby move. Watching my sisters grow into beautiful women. Knowing that I have the best mom in the world. The color green. My husband. Watering my flowers on breezy afternoons. Yesterday's sunset. Watching the way my dad interacts with Grace and Maddie. Hearing Todd talk about teaching his son to "pee" outside. The fact that I'll get to have a real drink in 10 weeks. :) Getting massages and painting my toes red. Long baths with a good book when Grace can't find me! Knowing that I had a really great childhood. Rearranging furniture. MY LIFE.

My bestfriend's wedding

Original Post Date: 4/27/2009

Saturday was my bestfriends wedding. I was her Maitron of Honor and it really was an honor and the first time I held that title. Lacie and I are as different as night and day and yet much the same as a cold beer and good joke on a bad day! With that analogy in mind... her wedding was amazing and sort of an eye opener for me. Lacie's sister and I are really good friends as well. And much more alike when it comes to what's on the "outside." We joked the entire time about how laxed and carefree Lacie was about so many things. She didnt care about many things I was made to think were a big deal. Tash and I tried convincing her that she needed more lights at the reception, and more color. Lacie and Joey werent worried about those things and you know what... when the reception rolled around not one person noticed that we hadn't put the extra lighting up and they didnt seem to care about decorations either. Lacie's wedding was perfect and very beautiful. All of the details were there in plain sight, everything came together like a fairytale. But most of all Lacie at every moment I was there had a smile on her face and not a single care in the world. She and Joey were enjoying their day 100% the way it should be enjoyed. They didnt have to worry about lights or drinks or food or anything of those things. They got to enjoy THEIR day to the fullest. In the end I learned to care less about the material things and enjoy the things that really matter. People don't remember your weddind decor... they remember the look on your face and whether or not your cried or laughed. Cheers to Lacie Annette... you're the best!

Today... April 22, 2009

Wake up. Yawn. Good Morning Grace. Pass Todd in kitchen. Wash face. Brush teeth. Put make-up on. Get dressed. Decide its a good morning because I knew exactly what I was going to wear and didnt have to change 3 times. Still mad at Todd. Passed him in the hall. Barely answered. Smile at Grace eating cereal. Put clothes in dryer. Make bed. Tell Grace to get the brush. Fold blankets. Clean up bathroom. Tell Grace to get the brush for the 8 th time. Remember that I'm a mom, a wife, a daughter, sister. Wow... Life happened. Stop to be thankful. Still mad at Todd. Grace driving me nuts because she doesnt want to brush her hair and still insists on wearing her big sisters shoes to school. Finally.... in the car on the way to school. Feel bad for losing temper with Grace. That kid is something else. Remember DVD that needs to be returned to Block Buster. Remember why I quit renting movies. Turn around and go home to get DVD. kiss and hug at the classroom door. Its a good morning. Wish Grace a good day. Baby is moving. I smile, a big smile. Wow... we're going to have a baby boy. I love Todd. Still mad at him though. Dr. Pepper and burrito from McDonalds $2.87. Got a small Dr. Pepper so I wouldnt feel so bad. Office is busy already. Mediation today. Good morning all. Secretary's day. Happy day to everyone. Thank you to everyone. Good job everyone. Move on with day. Remind self to return DVD. Pants are tight. Baby moves. Need small cup of coffee. Drink coffee and answer emails. I'm tired. Heart burn. Who the hell named it that? My throat is burning not my heart! I'm still tired. Jeez, I feel drained. Invoicing... not in the mood to work. Just want to sleep. Can't sleep. Too much to do. Remind self of things to be thankful for. Still not ready to like Todd again. Click off and on screen, day dream and ponder about life. Did I wake up here one day. It all went so fast. Grace is almost 4. Maddie is 5. Both in big girl school soon. New baby in the house soon. DIAPER BAGS all over again. Forgot about that part. Not so much fun although I did find a really cute one! A boy is going to be diffrent. Maddie was so easy and is so laid back. Grace is "spirited" i.e. spoiled and rotten! What will this little boy be like? Shit... little boy still doesnt have name. Need to get moving. Email to Todd reminding him that we need a boy name, a summer schedule and of all the stuff happening in May. Snap out of it. You're being paid to work, not organize your life. Baby is moving. I smile. I have my very own family. Wow. A family. Can't believe it. We're all growing up. Lacie will be married in 3 days. Dwayne finally proposed (I think it snowed in hell) Todd is having a baby. Lance is playing house and doesnt talk to anyone anymore. Yep, it's official. We're adults. It does feel good. I sometimes miss those days though. Friendship was so loyal and steady. Now we have to check our calendar to text each other. Oh well... thankful for the memories we made. Work. Lunch, home for a nap. Up. Drive back to office. Work. Surf. Work. Time to go. Hey Grace. Hi teacher. She did what!? Drive home. If you dont start listening no summer camp. Did I forget to read that book on parenting? I must have the cliff note version. Note to self: Child rearing book is needed re: 4 year old stubborn daughter - the cute kind with pretty eyes. Yep. We're going to have some long days. Look out pre-k. Home. Pregnancy is wearing me out. I'm big, bored and getting hungry again. I love you baby and I'm ready for you to be here. Call Todd. Doesnt answer so I decide not to apologize for being a bitch all day. Oh well. Next time. Todd calls back. Nevermind. Feel sorry for self because I'm big, hot and pregnant and while I am starving it is not for anything in this house! Company coming over today to swim. Is it too late to cancel. Nah - it'll be fine. Grace is really looking forward to it. Company comes. Kids play. I life the wife. She's easy to talk to. Order pizza. Kids play well actually. Todd forgot that two days ago he said he was not going to drink anymore until the baby was born since I couldnt drink. He drinks 3. I decide to let it go but know I really wont. Seriously self - deal with it. Bathe Grace. Bathe self. Todd and Grace passed out on sofa. So cute when they sleep. Frick and Frack if I do say so myself. Wish Maddie were here. She's curl up with me. She's the calm one although she's got a streak of her own too! In bed to watch TV. Nothing good on TV. I only like TV on Monday and Thursday. Decide to take ou the laptop. Surf Acadiana Moms page. Look at facebook page. Decide to check out myspace. Vent about day. Baby moving now. Smile. Smile again. Yep, I am blessed. Good nite.

Original post: 4/22/2009

I've learned

I've learned that we all get hurt. At some point in our life each of us will fight some sort of emotional battle which will in turn dictate our character, our disposition in life, our overall way of treating other people and reacting to future battles. Funny thing is though, we really do have the option to take from each battle whatever we want. We can take the good being the "lesson" or we can take the bad being the part the we feel "wronged" us. Why is it that so many of us choose to move forward with the chip on our shoulder that screams "I was hurt... I deserve the option to treat people badly because of it"? What I find most ironic is this... Often we pledge our dislike, disregard or hate for someone for the way they have treated us or the lack of thereof and yet in turn we treat everyone else the exact same way. Because of the hurt one person has caused us we become that person hurtful person without even noticing it. And we someone brings it to our attention we feel mistreated and offended because somehow we think we're the victim. My final thoughts on the subject are this: Life is hard but it's beautiful too. People are going to hurt you, that part is inevitable but it does not give you the right to hurt other people. Let go... move on... learn from it... be a better friend... be a better person.

Original Date: 4/21/2009

Just Me

I LOVE THE SMELL OF FRESH CUT GRASS, I LOVE BIRTHDAYS AND CHRISTMAS. I HAVE TOO MANY PAIRS OF SHOES AND NOT ENOUGH SHIRTS. I LOVE PJ'S AND PANTIES AND GYM SHORTS. I EXERCISE TO RELIEVE STRESS AND READ TO SECURE MY SANITY. I LIKE TO SEW. I LOVE GIRAFFE'S AND TURTLES AND I BUY THINGS BECAUSE THEY'RE ON SALE NOT BECAUSE I NEED THEM.

Original date: 12/10/2008